Slow news day when my local paper (by paper I’m mean my city’s newspaper website as it’s not the early 90s anymore) has as its lead story “Paris Hilton, Past Her Prime?”. So, while reading this I’m thinking… I couldn’t give less of a crap about Paris Hilton with the exception of say, Kim Kardashian. Wait, I’m in luck, this journalistic masterpiece ticks both boxes in a battle of who wants to be the biggest celebrity prostitute.
This counts as news huh? The worst thing is that I’m certain this article got a lot more hits (of which I have shamefully contributed one hit to) than an article on the worst famine to hit Somalia in 60 years which threatens to wipe out 12 million people. Guess that one wasn’t sexy (or slutty it seems) enough to get top spot (made it to 11th though).
So let’s examine this important news story in finer detail. Some ABC news guy (Dan Harris) asks Paris “‘Do you worry at times that people who have followed in your footsteps like Kim Kardashian are over shadowing you?”. She says “Not at all”. He follows up with ‘Do you worry about your moment having passed?” Then very maturely, she gets up and storms off.
I really like this guy’s work. He was probably thinking, I just wanted to be a real journalist and here I am interviewing this talentless piece of nothing that seems to have a spellbinding hold over my 13 year old daughter.
I don’t really care that she’s jealous of Kim Kardashian, or that she’s not as popular as she used to be. To be honest, I can’t really see the difference between them. Both contribute nothing but whorish influence on stupid girls and prove that if your dad has made a lot of money, you too can be idolised by scores of wannabes that are lacking serious role models.
Surely Kim and Paris really should have been allocated their 15 minutes of fame (i.e. homemade sex movies), then just like regular trash, been taken out to the tip and used as landfill. Unfortunately, like a bad STD (which I’m sure between them, they have the majority), they linger and cause much irritation. Seriously, can’t we just have them killed.
Related articles
- See Paris Hilton Walk Out of TV Interview (eonline.com)
- Paris Hilton Accused of Being Washed Up, Must Consult With Publicist (mediabistro.com)
xeriouslywtf 
Awesome post!
By the way, they both suck!
Thanks Hook. If only everyone felt the same way.
I don’t know if they both do what The Hook intimates — I am probably the only sighted human in the western world who has not seen their home videos. The only thing I know about them is that Paris was not very entertaining during the ten minutes I watched her TV show “The Simple Life”. In spite of my lack of familiarity in these two’s exploits and accomplishments, there are huge differences between them. Take a look at their blouses (hint: Kim’s differences are huger than Paris’) and one is blonde and the other’s brunette.
A lack of familiarity in this case is a blessing. You’re right about Kim’s differences, they are truly different shaped.
Totally like bad STDs! -_-
And I feel they’re spreading their love around at an infectious rate.